Just sitting waiting for healing to happen doesn’t help: it only lengthens the process. Working to become a positive influence is what moves things forward. If you want help:
Listen. When your loved one needs to talk, listen without trying to defend, explain, rationalise or excuse your behavior. Don’t try to correct their misperceptions or lessen their pain by minimising it. Validate. Don’t tell somebody, You should feel that way. When people talk about their pain, often they are doing the work necessary to help them heal. By letting them know their feelings are legitimate rather than waking them feel weak or silly, you enable them to work through the negative emotions. Apologize. Yes again! Whoever said LOVE MEANS NEVER HAVING TO SAY YOU ARE SORRY… didn’t know much about human relationships. Every genuine apology promotes healing. A heartfelt -i am sorry- is a medicine to a wounded soul. So apply it till its no longer needed- & your loved one will let you know when that is. Repair. Offer to help repair the hurt you have caused. I know i have wounded you, & i really want to know what i can do to help heal the damage. Genuinely spoken, those words realign and make you part of the solution, not just the cause of the problem. God said i have heard your prayers and seen your tears: i will heal you, (2 KINGS 20: 5) and the sooner you become actively engaged in promoting the healing process, the sooner you will get out of the penalty box and back on the field.

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